A Sad End, but my Beginning

I sat on the varsity bench yesterday in Bensalem, in my polo shirt and jeans taking in a night that I will never forget. This night was meant for me to learn, to get me ready for what I will hopefully be doing next year and the year after. It did just that. As I made my facebook status that night, I "will never forget the game, the sights, the sounds, the atmosphere, and mostly the emotion of tonight."
It was a night where I didn't really want to be a presence, I was there more to sit back and take it all in. I did just that. In the locker room before the game I watched how everyone prepared and then listened to every word Nolan and the rest of the coaches spoke. With 30 minutes on the clock the team went out to get some shots up for 7 minutes before coming back for the real pregame speeches. Before everyone went out Coach Nolan told me and Timmy to stand behind the basket while they warmed up and to take it in, he said it's important for you guys to understand what is going on. So we went out and after a couple minutes Bensalem came out too. This is when I began to realize that I did need to have this experience before I could play in a game like this myself. When Bensalem came out I was scared and nervous and I was to play no role in this outcome. Their team was huge and athletic and much more intimidating in person than they seemed on film. After all the warmups and stuff the game was about to begin and i noticed the crowd as they started to make noise. Noise that would not stop the whole game, and noise that would get three times as loud when they dunked twice. The game was unbelievable, emotional all over and one of the best games I have ever watched. That was very important for me, but the basketball IQ stuff can be talked about elsewhere. The important thing is the end because it affected the emotions at the end of the game and created images that I will never forget as long as I love.
We were down 5 with about 12 seconds when Hobson missed a three which was rebounded by Sean McGough who made one of the craziest shots I have ever seen. He turned around dribbled backwards three steps to the 3 pt line, jumped up, spun around, got fouled, and somehow made the shot. He missed the free throw which was rebounded by Brian Palmerer who missed a layup. That was rebounded by Sean whose layup barely rolled out and we lost by two. It almost brought me to tears and I was just there to watch.
The locker room after the game is really where I got to see some of the most important things, things that will remember every time I touch a basketball from now on. The words Nolan and the other coaches spoke will stick. So will the tears I saw in many an eye. As will the words still written on the board and everything else in that room.
There were two key moments though that were extremely powerful to me. The first was a conversation between Coach Wise and Sean McGough. Coach was telling him how he also had a shot like that in which he also missed. He said it will be there before you close your eyes at night and you will replay it in your head a million times. He said eventually one thing will change. Sean said jokingly, "It goes in?" Wise smiled and said, "No, but you realize the ball was in your hands. You didn't watch it, you had the chance yourself." This he means in a good way. Thank God for at least having that opportunity. They gave each other a hug and Sean walked away. Wise saw me standing there and turned and said, "I don't want to hug you like that. Not under these circumstances." I will do my best to make sure that it is different, that we are celebrating when we hug, not dealing with a loss.
The second moment was with the other McGough twin, Kevin. Here is a text i sent my friend on the bus going home referring to this moment: "His eyes. The tears. The look he gave me when he put out his hand and said Kevin Cox you got it next year." I almost cried looking him in the eyes as he spoke those words with red rings around his eyes himself.
All the emotion of that locker room has prepared me so much for my future. This was one of the most powerful nights of my life. My turn is coming soon and I know that night will be twice as emotional when it is the end for me too.