Running Out of Time

This is not blog about the book running out of time which is mysteriously similar to the movie the village, so don't worry. In all seriousness though, I feel like I'm running out of time. It's not that I'm going to die soon, but I feel I don't have much time left for some things that i love.

I had a conversation with my dad yesterday about college and options for sports to play and stuff like that. It made me realize that in two years I will graduate high school and lose so many of the things and opportunities that I have come to love. There will be no more coaches telling me I could return kicks for them and there will be no more thoughts of, hey I could play football. There won't be thoughts about what it would be like to run track instead of baseball. In two years I will have made decisions, that will have all happened, and for the rest of my life all I will have is memories.

This also adds pressure in my mind. I can't change what I do in the next two years once it's done. I won't have the chances I have now ever again, and I absolutely don't want to fuck something up by making a decision that takes away from me getting everything out of these chances that I can. when all I have left is memories, I want those memories to be great, to make me smile whenever I reminisce.

After two years are up there won't be chances to go to states with my best friends at Chester Valley. When the tournament comes, two little mistakes and you may never get another chance to fulfill a dream. For some reason this isn't enough to motivate some people, to make some people try their best and do everything they can to have success. I don't understand that at all. Not giving a shit about a game is a disappointment to myself. There isn't that much time left to have fun doing some of these things we love to do so give it your all. Make the most of every moment because soon enough all you will have is a memory.

R.I.P. Harry Kalas, I Miss You Already

Today around noon one of the greats was lost, Harry Kalas, announcer for the Philadelphia Phillies. The game will never be the same without Harry the K behind the mic. As my coach told me today, I was blessed to hear Harry call baseball games.

I can already hear his voice ringing through the heavens. "Swing and a long drive, watch this baby, outta here! Home run..." and "Swing and a miss, struck him out" in that famous voice will play on in my head forever. His birthday wishes and wishes of good health to those dealing with sickness will also be missed during every Phils game. My whole life I've imitated his great calls and I will always, and now I can share the story of this great man.

I was shocked to hear of his death today and it has brought me to tears. He was a great man and idol who deserved all the recognition he received and more. He is a Hall of Famer where his plaque will forever hang. He tore down the final number replacing the number of Phillies games at the Vet with 0 as they moved into Citizens Bank Park. Harry got to add to his famous strike out call a World Series Championship call in his final full season. He died in a way I'm sure he wanted to, in the announcers booth getting ready to do what he loved, watch the Phils win.

Spring Break & the Final Push

All spring break I've been happy and I've been thinking about what spring break is and the push that's left until summer. Today is the final respite before the final push of my sophomore year, and naturally I use it to write about the important things that come to mind.

Spring break is a much needed break. I was running low on the fuel needed to complete the tasks school requires day in and day out and then finally there was spring break, giving me a chance to refuel and just be happy. Not only is spring break a much needed break, but it is a preview. Spring break is a preview of what is now within sight, summer. It's like a warm up to summer. The weather is warming up, there's less school work and time in school to be thinking about, and you are finding time to spend with friends and family. It's a little piece of a toned down summer put into early April and it's definitely enough to make you smile and be thankful. And this year the last day is a beautiful day and a wonderful holiday. My Easter was great food, nice gifts, family time, and the powerful reminder that my mom survived cancer. A great way to end a great week.

Now is also a day to look towards the future. Over the next two months plus we will be in school consistently for the fourth quarter. We are tired, we are fed up with school, we had summer dangled under our noses for the past week and now we want it all, but it's going to take a final clutch fourth quarter push before we can celebrate the arrival of summer. Even the first week is going to be a very tough challenge with most of us doing a research paper, and that's what most of this marking period will be: a challenge. The tough ones won't crack, the tough one's will still look toward the A's and say that's what I will get. Be a tough one, don't crack, and it will be well worth it come summer.

I hope everyone had a great break, now let's finish off this year strong and celebrate summer together.

Another Self-proof

So as I said in the last post, this is also about me being proud of myself for being what i preach. Now usually I'll give every detail and go very in depth about things, but this time I won't. I could sit here and write forever about the relationship I've had over the past 5 months with this very special friend. But I will not, I don't want to, it would be too hard. I'll give the important things so you can get an idea of what this means to me, but the rest will not be written.

5 months ago a person I barely knew of at all messaged me on facebook needing help with some problems about her ex-boyfriend and best friend. For the 5 months (from then until now) they did not talk. She needed a best friend and I was there for her always. We fought and were overemotional with each other all the time, but in the end I was there for her. She and her ex/ bestfriend are talking again now. I don't know what about or what type of friends they are, but they are talking and she isn't upset as she once was. Sometimes it was really hard for me to help her, it hurt me in many ways. Despite that I always fought through, telling myself she is well worth it and she deserves me to be there for her.

Recently we talked about this and she thanked me and siad that she can't explain how amazing I had been and how much it meant to her. I said how it feels cool to be what I preach, a fighter and someone who will fight willingly for someone else. She said yea you should be because you are exactly that. She said I had changed her life and thanked me again. I don't know how much we will talk anymore or anything like that, but I will always be proud that I could fill a gap for someone and fight for someone as I did. I want to thank her for allowing me to be that person for her, for putting the pressure on me; that's what I love and it feels great now.